Exploring Femdom

Exploring Femdom Part 1

Partial Transcript of the podcast ~

On todays kink and coffee ~ We are going to sip to and dive into the topic of

Exploring Female Domination ~  The beginning.

You may think that it;s nothing more than laying back and letting your favorite fuck buddy do the work and ride you like a cowgirl into the sunset of pure pleasure. But, it is so much more than that. If only everything were that simple.

When I type ‘Female Domination’ into google, it immediately brings up porn sites with links that misrepresent everything about what femdom is! I understand that everyone is going to have their take, have their spin on it – that is kind of the beautify of femdom. The different layers that comes with it. But, to be so grossly misrepresented in a way that has new to the lifestyle and world of femdom submissives having these ideas – just like they will say don’t use PORN to learn about sex, don’t use PORN to learn about femdom.

Do your fucking research.

MOST dominatrices and femdommes (lifestyle, pro and online) are willing to train a new to the lifestyle submissive. Willing to help guide someone that has never once touched on the topic but somehow found his or herself drawn to it…but NO ONE is interested in someone that lies back and expects it all handed to them.

This is the world of technology, there is no excuse for exploring a thing or two. Lets say you have zero technology (I will even ignore the fact that you are listening to my voice via modern day technology) but some how claim there is no way of telling what you are ‘in to’ – there are books. I have them and over time we will start to go through them as we go further in discussion with our cups of coffee.

To begin in the world of female domination, as a submissive, you should have an idea of where you want to even start. Do you feel submissive to women? DO you find yourself pinning for her attention and approval?

Right off the bat can you handle taking orders from a woman that you have designated in your mind as your superior? Can you handle the rejection of said woman because she doesn’t designate you as her submissive?

Just because you find yourself submissive, does not mean that you have the rights or access to a particular female dominatrix– lifestyle, pro, distance or otherwise. There is not a single thing that will ever grant you access to someone else. NO MATTER WHAT.

Even in the pro and distant side – there are expectations. Minimal expectations. If you want to begin to dive into the femdom world, you have to be ready to submit and obey. You have to know your limits – you have to know your boundaries.

FEMDOM 101 for submissives Is to be open minded and not passive aggressive. Do your homework (even a tad little search that could take less than 10 minutes) on someone you are wanting to submit to.

It is important because your head space as a submissive is important. Some of you can go or come from such a dark place that you don’t want it to fall into the wrong hands. Some of you are so desperate for that connection, or so eager to serve and obey that you fall into the hands of someone that is malicious, ill-intended, someone that can actually do you more harm than good.

I’ve been around long enough when a fuck boy has crossed my path.

A fuck boy being defined as someone that loses his ever loving mind when he sends me this laundry list of expectations and requirements, then decides to insult and attempt to degrade me, put me down, make me feel bad for being a pro and distance dominatrix. I have my expectations and I am completely comfortable with them, and have the backbone of a tree (a trunk like one too) their incessant blabbering and bitching is a moot point and will get them no where in life. I hope they find some happiness with the fact that when they speak with their own mothers…their mothers wish she had just give the fuck boy sons father a blow job that night. HAHAHAHAHA (Gotta have some fun with trolls 😉 )

BUT, I am concerned about a legitimate submissive and even more so in a new submissive or someone that thinks they are submissive based on some PORN they saw ~ Because your headspace may not be as strong. Your subspace is open and ready to learn and soak up knowledge and grow. Don’t let a bad experience destroy it but also, a little background and a little research on your part can help prevent that.

Pathetic fuck bois and misrepresenting femdoms are a dime a dozen and yet the fake dom can hurt your subspace and I would rather you strengthen and learn more.

I’d rather you dive into the world of female domination and male submission and explore all the nuances and layers and excitement it has to offer. To an extent you do get to sit back and relax. Just do as you are told without question, without hesitation. But, that takes trust, and you need to ensure you put your trust in someone that has the best interest of her submissives at heart.

If you are looking for one that isn’t at all on the pro circuit one that does ‘it all for freee’’’ then you need to join sites like fetlife and join local groups. There is very little chance that in an online forum you are going to see the type of connection that is akin to a personal, one on one, monogamous relationship. ‘not saying it doesn’t happen – I have a few now that Im sure are reading and listening as I speak. But the spark was special. I cant explain it because it has everything to do with human connection and nothing to do with the lifestyle. It just happened that we connected on the femdom circuit, and almost instantaneously on the human circuit – and they still followed my rules and expectations.

Do yourself a favor and do 10 minutes or more of research when you find someone you are ready to submit to—you’ve already read or listened to the words she written or spoken. Doing a stretch more will have you discovering if shes been around or what her story is and if it aligns at all with yours.

Because when you are REALLY ready to explore the world of female domination you have to be ready to serve and obey. You have to be willing, ready and prepared to do what is expected of you.

Share your boundaries and limits

I and my femdom colleagues will know these…and while you will have only ever thought these femdom fantasies were make believe – we will make them come to live and / or blur those lines of fantasy and reality.

We will get to know you more than you know yourself. So dive in. Explore femdom…learn you a thing or two…and that thing or two is going to be about yourself. You’ll thank your dominatrix for it later.

That wraps up our discussion today ~ hope your coffee or your favored drink was divine.

You can visit me at www.mistresslillith.com to read about:

How to find a mistress

Not get scammed by a mistress online

You can also follow me on twitter @mistresslillith and questions, comments or topic requests can be submitted in the comments below ~

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